Friday, November 12, 2010

God Help the Person Who Gets Between a Mama Bear and Her Cub

mama bear

Ron and I were on our way up to the Health  One medical office at 12207 Pecos. I had gotten a call from Adrian who was scalded with hot water at work and a manager was driving him there for treatment. I told him to hang tight and I would be right there.  We got there pretty quickly but when we walked in, Adrian had already been taken back to the room.

Us: "We are here for Adrian can you please show us what room he is in?"

Office Worker: " No, you can't go back there".

Us: " Excuse Me?'

Office Worker " It's office policy. No family members are allowed back with the patient."

Us: "What? why?"

Office Worker: “ It’s for the protection of the patient. The patient’s safety is our first priority”.

Us: “ Oh come on, you are saying YOU are protecting our son from US?”

Right now my anxiety level was skyrocketing. From the minute my son was conceived I did everything in my power to protect, love and keep him safe. I wanted, needed to tell him we were there for him, to comfort him and let him know he was not alone.


Office Worker: “ He signed an agreement saying no family members would be allowed in the room.”

Us: “ Let’s see it.”

Officer worker hands us a treatment agreement with no signature.

Us: “This has no signature.” And then, trying to appeal to office worker’s sense of mothering; “ Please try to understand, how would you feel if your child was injured? Would you want to be there for him?”

Office Worker: “This isn’t about me, I am not in that position.”

Us, getting more desperate: “You didn’t answer the question!”

Office Worker: “ It is office policy for the protection of the patient.”

Us: “Our daughter, also a young adult, was in this office 2 years ago when she cut her hand at work. They let us go back with her.”

Office Worker: “That was different, she was bleeding.”

Us : “ So you have a policy that no family members are allowed back with their children, for the patient’s protection, except when they are bleeding?”

Then the doctor walked out to talk to us.

Doctor: “Do you have power of attorney to make decisions for him?’

Us: “ Well no” , he is a young adult. None of this had anything to do with us just wanting to see Adrian . I don’t think it is rare for a parent, or any family member to be with another when one has been injured. That is the human way. To be with and comfort your child is something that comes out in a fierce way, naturally; it can’t be can’t be helped nor would I want to stop these feelings. I felt like I was in the Twilight Zone where nothing makes sense and people have crazy-distorted ideas but they treat you like YOU are the crazy one.

At that moment my mom called and I started crying and sobbing into the phone about what was going on here and how they wouldn’t let us see him. I said I was going to file a complaint. I said I need the number where I submit a complaint. I said I was really pissed off and upset about it; I couldn’t believe it!

Doctor: “You must not use foul language in this office building!”

Us : ”I/she have/has not used foul language!”

Doctor: “Some people would disagree with that statement”. Then he walked back to the treatment room.

Office Worker: “Adrian hasn’t asked for you”. (provocative statement)

Adrian knew we were on our way and he knew we would come to him when we got there.

By this time, I was so upset I could hardly breathe. Maybe by this time they started to become concerned about the commotion because Office Worker came out and said one of us could go back with Adrian!

We both went back and they didn’t argue about it. I think they wanted the ferocious sobbing mother out of the waiting room.

We enter a very large treatment room which debunked the possible explanation of a tiny treatment room where loving and concerned parents could be in the way.

Nurse : “ It is wrong for your son to see you crying”.

I started crying harder. It is my experience in life that when I am super mad and frustrated at a lack of mutual understanding with someone, I cry. I wish I didn’t. It is a rare event for me but that’s when I cry.

Nurse: “ Now you need to sign the consent for treatment papers, remember, the ones they said he already signed.”

Me: “Adrian, don’t sign those papers until you read over them carefully”.

Nurse: ‘ He is my patient, Adrian you need to listen to me, you are my patient not hers, You have to sign these papers.”

This is when I looked at her straight in the face and told her to shut up. Yep, I did and I am ok with it.

Nurse: “You will not speak to me like that!”

Me: “You people need to learn how to work with people, your “bedside manner” is shockingly horrendous.

You would think they would learn how to be sensitive to worried family’s needs. I know that is part of medical services training. So much of it was in their delivery. It was if they were reading a bad script, word for word, “It is office policy”. They were unfeeling, unsympathetic, unhelpful, condescending, power-hungry employees at Health One, 12207 Pecos St.

Nurse: “We have great bedside manners. “

So, Adrian is going to be OK. He has 2nd degree burns on his hand and lower arm. The dressings need to changed every day. It is very painful right now. He is worried about missing work as he has rent and other bills to pay. Hopefully, worker’s comp insurance will help. Hmmmm, this was the medical clinic that is under contract to workers comp insurance. It’s starting to make sense …..

Is this typical behavior for workers comp cases? Have you had any experience with this kind of communistic behavior? Did they want to keep us away from Adrian in case we were to help him make up a story as to how the accident happened?

I feel, maybe, a tiny bit bad that I lost my cool and said I was pissed and told someone to shut up. But, no one and I mean no one can get between a mama bear and her cub. I will stand up to that person or thing anytime. When it comes to my children, that’s when I am strongest.


Country Wings in Phoenix said...

Oh Cindy Sweetie...
Honey I am right there with you. I would be the BIGGEST grizzly bear. Hospitals do not know who they are messing with when they try to stand between a Momma and her Baby, no matter what age that baby is. They are the only things in our lives, we OWN and we aim to keep them.

I think considering the way you were treated, you did very well sweetie. The nerve of them. Then they were treating him, and he hadn't even signed the forms as of yet. Boy I think I would be writing someone up there.

Hugs to you sweet friend. I am so a cheerleader on your side. Many hugs and so much love, Sherry

Angela said...

I'm just so blown away. I'm stunned. I can't get over any of their behaviors, even the Dr.'s..pissed a bad word? My goodness they have heard ten time worse...I'm so glad he is doing better and will say some prayers on quick healing and for his finances...

Cindy, girl, you were amazing. I think I would have ended up in jail. Just reading your post was getting me so riled up, pissed is NOT the word I will use,,LOL..

Oh, I have to go on again,,lol..told you I was ticked over this with you...for them to talk to your son (the cough cough Nurse..cough cough) don't listen to your mother listen to me..

OH my gosh!! ok,,I better go,,it so early in the morning and I need to get back to bed. Woke up to get a glass of water and headed to the computer and was drawn to your post. I think I need a ciggie now to calm down a bit so I can go back to sleep..

((((Cindy))))Your an awesome mom!!

Debby said...

I can't beliee they treated you this way. I would have told them to Shut Up as well.......I don't blame you at all.
I hope your son is okay and will heal okay. It sounds painful for sure. Who do they think will change those bandages? Just saying.